Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Here's the kitchen, there's the dining room and down the hall is ROBOTARD WORLD

I am so in awe of the married couple that does the podcast about collecting Star Wars crap. They've got this massive collection and they named the part of the house they keep it in "The Sithsonian". Everybody else would call it "the basement". They have video of The Sithsonian in their 100th podcast. I can't really match the enormity of their collection with my disorganized pile of aged geriatric toy robots but I do want to be incredibly batshit crazy like them and name my laundry room something awe inspiring.

Back when I was a kid all the toystores were suffixed with 'World' or 'Palace' or 'City'. Then TRU came along and destroyed the cities and burned down the palaces. That sucked! Kiddie city, Playworld, Children's Palace, Circus World-they all went under. So I need my laundry room name to be suffixed with "World" in their honor-something like "Robotard World". Otherwise I'd be stuck with "Gay Robots R Me", which is actually pretty good.

For a while I was calling it Fortress Messimus because it was so out of control messy. But "Fortress" is inappropriate because that conjures up majestic images of an setup more elaborate than the stage backdrop at an Iron Maiden concert, when in actuality all I'm doing is running an old folks home for 20 year old toy robots. My laundry room is where roboplasticos go to die, like a robot hell. It's hardly a fortress-it's more like a retirement community for Dinobots.

I think I've since found a fitting acronym for my collection of aged, geriatric toy robots with peeling stickers and yellowing plastic. It has to be an acronym because all the cool names in the 80's were acronyms - K.I.T.T., M.A.S.K., C.O.B.R.A., Magnum P.I., etc. Behold, "G.A.Y.T.RO.N. World"! GAYTRON as in "Geriatric Aged Yellowing Toy RObots Nuthouse". It's retarded but I'm never going to come up with anything as good as the Sithsonian.

4 comments:

Weasel said...

G.A.Y.T.RO.N. World? Are we sure that's not the original home planet of Starscream? (I'm kidding! Put the rocks down, people!)

Prime wants to call our collection room the "wRECk Room". Yep, as in Recreational and wrecked. Don't ask.

viscous said...

When I was growing up in Erie, PA, the best toy store was a local store/chain called Toy World (later Mac's Toy World). That place kicked ass. I got a Shockwave bootleg there (but I think I returned it when I realized it didn't have electronics) and they actually had the mail-away TF toys in the store (Omnibots, Reflector, Powerdashers). They've been gone for many years and I still mourn their passing.

naladahc said...

Kiddie City. Children's Palace, I remember them well.

I still remember a wall of Micronauts at Kiddie City! I'm old.

We also had a chain called Hobby Center in which I recall a clearance of 15 or so G1 Jetfires for $18 each or something.

And I deem you worthy to call it "G.A.Y.T.RO.N. World Of Love™"

Anonymous said...

CS:

Why not stick with the theme and call it "CAVERNA del ROBOPLASTICOS" or something? That may not be entirely grammatical.

I remember Mac's Toy World, too, Viscous.

Cordially yours:
Autobus Prime
w/minicon Farebox.

 

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