Friday, January 11, 2008


The latest sentimental holocaust in the Kingdom of Macrocrania was brought about by my decision to cut my hair, which I haven't even trimmed in over a year. This was not a hastily made decision and the emotional cataclysm that followed after I decided I didn't like my new look has threatened to undermine my sanity. Yeah I have a lot of regrets. Most of all I miss being the mexican Fabio of toy robots but even if now I look like Marcie from Charlie Brown at least I won't have to use half a bottle of shampoo every time I take a shower. Hair maintenance was getting so bad that I just stopped taking showers and I had to wear a diving mask to sleep so I could breathe through all the hair.

What really gets me is that cutting my hair means parting with a piece of me that was around a year ago, the last time I was in Antarctica. The last time I got it cut was down there and I guess that's part of the sentimentality that kept me from cutting it a year later. Cutting my hair is like cutting ties with that experience once and for all. It is breaking the connection with the last time I felt I was interesting. Moving on is tough and as I saw the five inch long strands of hair on the floor I felt like I was getting on with my life in a way. I also cry a little every time I take a dump because I miss my poos.

Excessive sentimentality is par for the course here in the Kingdom. I still haven't actually used my Soundwave the MP3 player because I can't decide which song I want to play first. The first song played on any new music equipment is a milestone, a celebration of sorts. I want it to be special. In fact I want it to be so special that I can't make up my mind and it's been over three weeks already. It should be something that represents me where I am in my life. As Fabio said in his CD, "When I play a special song, it's very important because it can express what I feel so perfectly." Right now what I'm feeling so perfectly is the sound an airplane makes when it crashes into a barber shop.


naladahc said...

How did my comment for this post end up on the other one?

It is like I stumbled into a Filthy Sanchez party and wasn't even invited!

Evil King Macrocranios said...

That's how I feel every time I go to Botcon as a walk-in.

Anonymous said...

So your hair is the source of your power, eh?

Evil King Macrocranios said...

Not power but suffering. Didn't Yoda say that hair leads to anger, anger leads to suffering? My hair is the source of my suffering.

Rob said...

Good Marcie analogy. I just got my hair cut after letting it grow for about six months. It was weird for the first few days, but I'm getting used to it now. I'll probably let it grow for several months before getting it cut again.


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Evil King Macrocranios was voted king by the evil peoples of the Kingdom of Macrocrania. They listen to Iron Maiden all day and try to take pictures of ghosts with their webcams.