Monday, December 11, 2006

1 a.m. Antarctica time=$10 your time

Okay so everbody knows I love where they post links to the MySpace pages of people who have recently died. A lot of the causes of death are mind numbingly bizarre like suicide over losing their ipod or fantastic car accidents that would kill Superman or falling off a cliff reaching for the cell phone they just dropped.

But suicides-man those are the ones that really get me, especially if the notes are good. I would like to take a moment to reflect on the most brilliant suicide note I have ever read on MySpace. It was written by a guy who hung himself about a month later. Although his grasp of capitalization was weak, his usage of varying font sizes and quotes was fantastic. There is some really good stuff here-he's not your usual emo guy trying to sound deep on MySpace. My favorite part is "if you love some one, or have deep feelings for someone at this very moment. go to your kitchen. grab the sharpest knife you can find and stab yourself repeatedly." Fuckin' awesome! This guy could have been the next Trent Reznor. I would totally have read his webcomic if he had one. I'd buy shirts with "remember-no one can care about you exept for tony and no one else wants to".

And for my final bit of webcest I would like to wank a bit to the hottest woman I have ever seen on internets. She's also a dead MySpacer so I will never get the opportunity to hit that. But her being hard to get on account of she's dead just makes her all the more hot to me!


naladahc said...

"But her being hard to get on account of she's dead just makes her all the more hot to me!"

I can't believe I just read that.

Evil King Macrocranios said...

I can't believe you understood it! My sentence structure is so awkward at times it's a wonder I have any readers.

If I was reading someone who wrote like me I would have stopped after the 4,000th sentence that began with a conjunction.


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Evil King Macrocranios was voted king by the evil peoples of the Kingdom of Macrocrania. They listen to Iron Maiden all day and try to take pictures of ghosts with their webcams.